Campaign Update
Things have been quiet around Drescher Campaign HQ for the past few months. This is largely because I easily wrapped up my party’s nomination back in the Spring of this year. That, coupled with the fact that I actively refuse to fund-raise, has given me the chance to REALLY spend some quality time...
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SOPA: A Call to Action
The entire Internet is abuzz with rage over the proposed SOPA legislation. SOPA is, unambiguously, a terrible piece of cronyism disguised as an effort to “protect” copyrights and should be opposed by pretty much everyone who ISN’T the greedy head of...
Campaign Update
Things have been quiet around Drescher Campaign HQ for the past few months. This is largely because I easily wrapped up my party’s nomination back in the Spring of this year. That, coupled with the fact that I actively refuse to fund-raise, has given me the...
Certificate of Mind Your Own B...
After years of hounding by racists, idiots and racist idiots, the President has released his long-form birth certificate. I must say, I’m disappointed.
In recent weeks, this issue had finally started to wear thin even among the absolute craziest members of the...
Issue: Defense, AT-ATs and Ame...
It has been brought to my attention that my musket-based domestic defense strategy may strike some voters as reckless and somewhat unreliable. I am not an unreasonable candidate and want to assure you that this is not the ONLY thing I have planned when it comes to...
Issue: The War on Drugs
Every year, we spend tens of billions of dollars prosecuting the “War on Drugs” that began forty years ago under Richard Nixon. Since the “War” began, the profits associated with narcotics cultivation and trafficking have skyrocketed, creating...
Drug Testing and Welfare
Recently, people have latched onto the idea that receipt of welfare benefits should be tied to successfully passing a random drug screening. The implication is that welfare should be used as a social engineering tool to “correct” the behavior that these...
I am running for President.
The President has announced his 2012 campaign, so I can’t afford to fall behind! Having consulted with friends and family over the preceding weeks, I have decided to throw my hat into the ring. This is not a decision I have made lightly. At great personal...
recent from News
Campaign Update
Things have been quiet around Drescher Campaign HQ for the past few months. This is largely because I easily wrapped up my party’s nomination back in the Spring of this year. That, coupled with the fact that I actively refuse to fund-raise, has given me the chance to REALLY spend some quality time...
Things have been quiet around Drescher Campaign HQ for the past few months. This is largely because I easily wrapped up my party’s nomination back in the Spring of this year. That, coupled with the fact that I actively refuse to fund-raise, has given me the chance to REALLY spend some quality time...
recent from Taxes
Issue: Taxes
Nobody succeeds by accident. While hard work and dedication are critical to every great success story, it’s equally important to recognize that you get to the top by standing on the shoulders of others. Your parents, your co-workers, you friends and generations of strangers who built and supported the...
Nobody succeeds by accident. While hard work and dedication are critical to every great success story, it’s equally important to recognize that you get to the top by standing on the shoulders of others. Your parents, your co-workers, you friends and generations of strangers who built and supported the...
recent from Marriage
Issue: Marriage
Marriage is none of the government’s business. After my election, marriage will be officially meaningless in the eyes of the government.
All adults (18+) are allowed to file for a Civil Tax Union with one other adult at a time. It is a binding agreement bearing the contractual legal weight of current...
Marriage is none of the government’s business. After my election, marriage will be officially meaningless in the eyes of the government.
All adults (18+) are allowed to file for a Civil Tax Union with one other adult at a time. It is a binding agreement bearing the contractual legal weight of current...
recent from 2nd Amendment
Issue: 2nd Amendment
The 2nd Amendment does, in fact, guarantee citizens the right to own firearms. My Administration will champion legislation allowing all adult non-felons to own as many 18th century muskets (and musket balls) as they can physically carry the distance between Lexington, MA and Concord, MA (7 miles) in four...
The 2nd Amendment does, in fact, guarantee citizens the right to own firearms. My Administration will champion legislation allowing all adult non-felons to own as many 18th century muskets (and musket balls) as they can physically carry the distance between Lexington, MA and Concord, MA (7 miles) in four...